The Moment I Had Been Waiting For

It was Thursday night, our last night together for our last night in South Dakota. As usual Amy (Trip Leader) asked us to describe our whole mission trip experience in 1 word. My word was “emotional.” To understand why I used this word, let me start from Day 1.

For many teenagers, Mondays are the worst day of the week, so you can imagine at the end of Monday how tired we were. That same night Amy popped up a question that stuck with me the rest of the week: “What are you learning about yourself on this trip?” Showing how tired everyone was, the room was dead silent when the question was asked. The question was brushed off, and we went on with other conversation about our day.

Tuesday night rolled around and Amy asked the same question, “What are you learning about yourself on this trip?” It was only 2 days into our trip and we were already supposed to know what we learned about ourselves? But I guess 2 days was enough for some people, because the question was answered by several. I became really frustrated because I couldn’t answer a simple question about myself.

Wednesday night came and Amy once again asked us the same question, which I still hadn’t answered. The next morning during devotion time I finished earlier than usual, so with the extra time went back through my devotion book to reread some scripture. As I was going back through the devotions, I stopped on Wednesday’s. The theme for Wednesday was to “Let go like Jesus.”

It was this moment that I had been waiting for the whole mission trip.

My Grandma passed away last year in October. The one person I told everything to was gone, and it left a gap in my heart. In our devotion from Wednesday there was a little space where we could write what was separating us from God. I wrote “death” in that space. And in the same instant I was rereading over my devotion from the past day I finally learned something about myself: I still had not forgiven God for taking away the most important person in my life.

But I decided to Let Go of the past and be thankful instead for everything God has given me. I should be thankful that I got to spend the time I had with her, because some people don’t know their grandparents. I should be thankful that I had her 14 years of guidance and love because without it I wouldn’t be the person I am today.

By Kim, a student on a YouthWorks trip to Martin, SD in June 2014.